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Is Anxiety Or Worry Sabotaging Your Life?

by | Mar 30, 2020 | Mental Health, Positive Psychology, Relationships | 1 comment

It's only fair to share…

Do you worry about your relationships, career, money or life?  Are you dwelling on worst case scenarios?

What is Worry and Anxiety?

Anxiety is an emotion we feel when we worry or dwell on the negatives, often about things that are going to happen in the future.  There are different types and intensities of anxiety, ranging from a little worry, generalised anxiety, social anxiety, to panic attacks.

Sometimes people refer to a worry or concern they have as anxiety i.e. they are worried about a specific upcoming situation.  Once that situation passes, their worry stops.  Other people feel more intense anxiety and/or prolonged anxiety over a period of time.

Types of Anxiety

Worry and anxiety can be specific to a situation, person or activity.  For example, I have worked with clients with many different types of anxiety, including anxiety about:

  • getting a new job or promotion
  • being around people
  • dealing with toxic workplace culture and relationships
  • interacting with a toxic partner, friends or family
  • their health or the health of a loved one
  • driving
  • making phone calls
  • an upcoming meeting or presentation
  • study and exams
  • getting up in the morning
  • life, etc.

Anxiety can lead to avoidance (e.g. not going out), procrastination (e.g. putting off doing specific tasks) or obsessiveness (e.g. being overly preoccupied with doing something or avoiding something).

Often fears are linked to anxiety.  For example, a fear of failure can cause a person to be anxious about doing new things.  Even phobias can be linked to anxiety.  For example, a phobia of flying can cause a person to be anxious about going on holidays.  People with obsessive compulsive conditions, PTSD and with specific physical and/or other mental health conditions can also often feel anxiety.

Managing Worry and Minor Anxiety

It is possible to manage and overcome worry and minor anxiety.  By paying attention to what causes it, you can then develop better coping mechanism for dealing with those situations.

The first step is for you to become aware of your thoughts.  Because all our thoughts are linked to our feelings, negative thoughts will often trigger negative feelings, like anxiety.  Pay special attention to any of the following:

  • Negative what if scenarios e.g. what if I fail, what if I make a mistake
  • Worst case scenarios in your mind about what could go wrong
  • Dwelling on or creating catastrophes in your mind

Then notice how you feel as you have these thoughts.  Is it anxiety, fear and/or some other emotions?

Also pay attention to what causes you to have the negative thoughts.  Is it a person, people, a situation you are in, an activity you are doing, what you are watching/listening to/reading, etc.?

Then consciously decide to respond differently next time you are in that situation.  This becomes a new way of being where you need to self regulate – notice your thoughts, feelings and behaviours, and then consciously respond differently.  This requires consistent effort and energy.  Alternatively, with NLP and Hypnosis techniques, this is much easier as your new responses are automatic for you.

Permanently Addressing Deeper Anxiety

If the anxiety is:

  • more intense in the case of generalised anxiety, social anxiety, panic attacks or phobias,
  • related to obsessive compulsive conditions, PTSD and specific physical/mental health conditions

much deeper subconscious work is recommended for permanent results.

Often major stresses have occurred in a person’s life that have caused or contributed to the above conditions. This is where is it important to identify, and quickly and permanently address the deepest subconscious issues that caused the anxiety and related issues. We can even do this without referring to, mentioning, discussing or working with past memories.  All aimed at empowering you to live a more confident, happier and fulfilling life.